So up until a couple days ago you'd think I'd forgotten all about writing. Well, I had, and Kasey writing again on her blogger inspired me to get back on track also.
I am daunted and yet not at all scared with the thought of having another baby boy come into the world in just over a month. It will take some time to adjust and get used to having another crazy boy around, with more diapers, and more food to make, and more sleep to lose. But there's also even more laughs, more unforgettable moments, and more joy from watching them grow ever bigger and stronger. Just earlier tonight, Ben actually hugged me; not the normal okay-I'll-let-Daddy-hug-me stuff, but when I picked him up he actually put his arms around me and squeezed and then patted my back. Oh, those unforgettable moments. They more than make up for the lost sleep and thin patience, and point out how silly our own desires can be compared to being there for a child.
I graduated from DMACC. No more community college (for now), next step is that bachelor's degree. Kasey and I were driving tonight, and she said something like "You realize we graduated high school 5 years ago?" And then we both thought/said "We should have college degrees by now!" That is, according to normal cultural expectations. We just decided to move to Iowa, get married, have kids, mow the lawn (or try), and skip a couple years worth of school in there. Which, working in the student loan field that I do (and doing the job that I do), I can confidently say that we are much better off for it. That degree (and others) will come, but in their own season. This fall I start at AIB College of Business, for a degree in business administration. The financial aid award letter came a while back, and seems like I will have to pay for just books out of pocket, unless I want to use company tuition reimbursement. So that was a tremendous blessing, one that I must not forget or forgoe. Side note: I've been thinking about small bookstores and rental properties a lot recently. Might just be my "Oh yummy, kool-aid!" habit coming up, but we'll see what God has in store.
I've been doing a lot of reading these last few weeks, especially since I've had all the extra time from no schoolwork. Now there's lots of time to read, no more textbooks and online exams and essays for a while. I just finished The Church Impotent, by Leon Podles, about how the Church in the West has slowly embraced liberalism and feminism, and as a result alienated men and practically outlawed authentic, Biblical masculinity. Very interesting, I'll probably write on here about it soon. I also just finished some garage sale fine, a children's encyclopedia volume on the American Civil War. Right now I'm reading a book on breastfeeding (why do there have to always be pictures?!?) and an apologetics book by RC Sproul. I have a long list of books to get through before the summer ends, nay before the baby comes.
I did read And the Shofar Blew by Francine Rivers again, and I will probably read it again by the end of the summer. Hard-hitting book, I cry a lot. Very spell-binding story, amazing characters, and well-written. Makes you think about ministry and how it can affect family and friendships; what the Church truly is and is not; and how messed up portions of the American church are. One of the things that always hits me hardest is the family relationships part. The main character struggles with his relationship (or lack thereof) with his father, as well as relating to his mother and wife and son. I can't help but think about my own relationship with my family, my mom and dad and brothers and sister; can't help but see where I have done things wrong, have caused pain and harm. Reading this book again showed me how far I have yet to come, and what I still have to do to make things right, at least as much as I personally can. There are still responsibilities and consequences that others must own up to, and God Himself still has work yet to do amidst the whole situation, but that doesn't mean I can neglect or ignore what I have to do. Nothing like a fictional book to make me finally understand that, and to see where I still struggle and to where I need to be.
I must finish this up, as it is getting late, and I have more reading to do.
Parents may have a dozen children, but each one is the only one for them.
-Aramaic proverb